HE pursues me

I was saved the same way a lot of kids were saved. When I was six years old I walked up to the front of the church, knelt down at the altar and asked Jesus to come into my heart. 

And He did. 

And it was great. 

I felt new and clean and ready to live a different life.

Unfortunately, while meeting Jesus came easily and quickly, knowing Him is taking a lot longer. A lot longer!

It’s been 30 years since I first met Jesus and I am learning new things about Him every day. 

My life has been filled with seasons of furiously seeking Jesus and seasons of tossing Him aside ... 

seasons of daily sacrificing my life to Him and seasons of selfishness ... 

seasons of grace and seasons of guilt ... 

seasons of pursuing His purpose for me and seasons of pursuing what my flesh desires.

Each season of my life has included Jesus, even when I tried to walk away from Him, to ignore Him. No matter how hard I tried to live for me, Jesus was still there calling me to live for Him. Even at my lowest points, caught in addiction, pride, jealousy, worry, anger or materialism, Jesus was right there with me.

When I offered myself as a slave to all kinds of sin, Jesus did not walk away from me. 

He wouldn’t even look the other way so I could do my dark deeds in privacy.

So my story is one of being constantly pursued by Jesus. I wish I could say it was the other way around, that I have always sought more and more of Him. 

But the way it really happened is the more beautiful story.

Jesus, the one who created me and the one who died on a cross for my sins, wants to be with me.

Let me say that again: 

Jesus, the one who created me and the one who died on a cross for my sins, wants to be with me.

He longs for a relationship with me. He has watched me do terrible things and still loves me. 

He still holds me in His arms when I come running back to Him.

It overwhelms me to think about the grace Jesus has given me. It confuses me because I don’t give grace like that. I run out of grace to give to others, but He never runs out of grace for us.

The grace of Jesus, the love of Jesus and the life of Jesus have become my passions:

I want to walk in the freedom His grace gives. 

I want to love others the way He has loved me. 

And I want to live the way He lived - constantly sacrificing Himself for those who need Him the most.